Arrival

It is never the way that you imagined it, so I never bothered to imagine it at all. Imagination can be useless in these situations. You imagine arriving in the city the way that you first did, with the sun peaking red and the minarets piercing the dawn. You imagine a city brimming with hope, potential and possibility. And what good does the imagination do when you arrive and actually the clouds are bursting up, and the dawn is a watery gray, and still there is hope and possibility but of a completely different, unfamiliar nature? Reality sometimes sits too close to the imagination, and they create a creaking dissonance that is better not experienced. Sometimes it is better to go in blind.

And so I went in blind.

I came here without a real idea of what it would be like. I forgot the vastness of this city. I forgot the men on the streets, with dark, piercing eyes and mischievous smiles. I forgot the sights and smells and sounds. I forgot how it crushes and suffocates, and on the other hand how you feel like you are flying. I forgot it all and I experienced something altogether new. I experienced a vast city, with men on the streets with piercing eyes and mischievous smiles. I experienced new sights and smells and sounds. I experienced an altogether crushing, and suffocating and yet uplifting sensation. It was a great arrival.

The only thing disappointing was that I somehow got into my head that I was special. I fell in love with this place, and so I up and decided to live here, and I thought my idea was unique. Landing in a hostel FILLED with erasmus students is a little disheartening. I see so many people had the same inkling, and I am mirrored. I never like mirrors because they are so very distorted. I am nothing like them. Nothing 🙂